Posted by: waterbaby87 | March 11, 2010

A Life Lesson on Love – The List

In my blog entry for December 27, 2009 , I explained the simple concept of being truly ready for that special someone. Dr. Wayne Dyer posted this article a few days ago that inspired me to bring forth a certain exercise for those who seem to want that someone special in their life. Of course, there is more than simply making a list to this – it is achieving a sense of self-worth along with it as well.

Are you ready?

HAHA Sorry, you just have to have a little fun during this!

You’re going to be a bit upset with me, since initially this seems very easy.

Step 1) Make a list of the characteristics and features you want in your dream partner. Yes, this includes even the strangest things that you like in your partner (ie. thermal shirt affinity, nose ring, ability to drive with one hand). ANYTHING! Put it on this list!

Step 2) Make sure the list includes personality characteristics, such as “Wants a commitment” or “Emotionally brave”, whatever you want, even something like “eco-conscious” or “sensitive” can make it on the list. Again, something you admire and are willing to live with.

Step 3) Take a look at the list. What is reflecting on that piece of paper that you want in yourself as well? Trust me, there is usually something on these lists that seem to make the partner have to compensate one’s own weaknesses.

Step 4) Put the list away – in your underwear drawer, in a binder, sofa… Just remember where it is.

Step 5) Forget about it being there, and begin working on yourself so you can embody that person you want to attract into your life. If time gets tough, it is okay to pull out the list and look at it, using it as a friendly reminder of why you are doing this.

Step 5 is usually the kicker for most people. See, it is easy to play the blaming game – blaming it on meeting the wrong people all the time, the whole “why me” thought process starts to kick in, and eventually the person simply doesn’t feel worthy but still expects for the list to magically appear in front of you. This can happen, and you may seem happy at first, but because you didn’t work on yourself, it’ll be a temporary situation (temporary as in it may lasts years and years, but not a lifetime).

Another symptom of not having gone through step 5 is usually seen in situations where there is “forbidden love”. Listen, let’s be real here, there is no such thing as it – we have the power to conquer anything nowadays. Long gone are the days where parents made influences on their children’s decisions, where classes are so stratified that people do not mix (although they could’ve back then, but nowadays its normal to hear about the maid marrying the homeowner), where races can’t mix. 10 year old Nujood Ali proved us this with her divorce. It doesn’t necessarily have to be this drastic, but I hear a lot about people finding the “one” and yet there are circumstances separating them. It’s okay. Don’t think that way. Because in truth, if you were on the right path with number 5, you wouldn’t encounter these issues because you have accepted that you are, really and truly, ready and worthy of a healthy relationship. Meaning if you encounter this, there is something going on inside of you that is preventing you from finding the healthy relationship you long for.

For this blog entry, I highly encourage you do these exercises, but read Dr. Wayne Dyer’s article as well. Can you imagine that the thing that saved your life was simply your journey to meet the one, not necessarily when you actually meet them? Simply amazing 🙂

All the love,



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